More than air

By: Cristina Martínez M.B.A, M.S, BCBA, LBA Coauthor: Ariadna Martin MS

When children feel overwhelmed, their world can suddenly shrink. A sound, a “no,” a change in routine, and then breathing becomes quick and shallow, shoulders tighten, and calm feels far away. In those moments, adults often say, “Take a deep breath”, but for a young child, especially one still learning to manage emotions, those words can feel abstract. What adults really mean is: “You’re safe; let’s find calm again”. Because breathing, in those moments, isn’t just about oxygen: it’s about guiding the body back to safety when emotions rise faster than words.

That’s where deep breathing tools come in. In Applied Behavior Analysis (ABA) programs, taking deep breaths is taught as a learned skill, often through imitation learning. Therapists and caregivers model the process (slow inhale, long exhale, relaxed shoulders) turning calm into something a child can see and copy. It might begin as a simple, playful exercise: “Smell the flower, blow the candle.” The adult demonstrates, the child imitates. Over time, the skill transforms from a shared game into genuine self-regulation.

For many children, breathing tools make the invisible visible. A pinwheel spins only with slow breaths. A bubble wand forms bubbles only when the exhale is steady. A breathing ball expands and contracts, mirroring the body’s rhythm. For children with sensory sensitivities, tracing a triangle or square with their finger (inhaling up one side, exhaling down the other) gives predictability and structure to each breath. These visuals and movements help connect what’s felt inside to what can be controlled outside.

What matters most is when we teach it – not in the middle of a meltdown, but before. In calm, playful moments, caregivers and therapists practice together: “Let’s blow our candle,” “Match my breathing ball,” “Show me your calm breath.” Through imitation, repetition, and gentle encouragement, the body learns a map back to calm. Then, when frustration or fear appears, that map is already there.

At American Behavioral Solutions (ABS), we believe breathing is more than a coping tool: it’s a doorway to confidence and self-control. By integrating breathing and imitation learning into programs, we help children build a skill they can carry anywhere. Because when a child learns to breathe through a moment, they’re not just calming down; they’re learning how to take charge of their world, one mindful breath at a time.